Do you want your date to offer to pay?


Maybe I'm old school, but I think it says a lot about a guy's character if he offers to pick up the whole check on the first date. 

Don't get me wrong, when I was single, I never EXPECTED anything from a guy, but I always thought it was a nice gesture when a guy picked up the tab. I always offered to pay my half anyway, but often, men would insist on paying the whole thing, especially if it was the guy who initiated the date in the first place. 

Well, according to new research, the majority of women are now insulted if the man picks up the whole check on the first date. Insulted?? I mean, come on. I'm all for equality in every way, and I have a job; I'm perfectly capable of paying my own way. But if I were on a date with a man and he wanted to pay, I'd say "thank you" and let him!

The only exception here is if I felt absolutely no connection to the guy. If I spent an entire hour dining with someone and KNEW it wasn't going anywhere long-term, I wouldn't want to let him pay for my meal, because it could send the message that I wanted to see him again. But if I were interested in a date #2, yeah, sure. Why not. I'll get the next one, or pay the tab at the bar if we go for after-dinner cocktails.

Basically, I think the lady should always offer to split the bill, but the gentleman should pay it, at least on the first date. Future dates, feel free to split it up or approach it in whatever way you feel comfortable.

Am I way off the mark here? I've been out of the dating game for about 8 years, and happily married for 5, so if I'm living in la la land, feel free to call me out!


Sarah Jacobs

Sarah Jacobs

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